Anonymous asked: hey love! I've been battling anorexia for years on and off. It's strange how my high weight of 140-145 can go as low as usually in the 120's when I'm anorexic. I can only get it as low as 113. How do you fight off depressing feelings? that's the reason that I gain weight and can't seem to keep off the extra few pounds to keep my looking great. When I starve myself I know depression is the one thing that makes my weight go up and down a few pounds ><. I know it must slow down my metablism too. I've had anorexica on and off for 8 years, since I was 11, so I'm sure it slows down my metablism. The long long walks don't cut it very often anymore. any other suggestions?

WHY MUST YOU BE AN ANON?! I’d love to check up on you dear <3 How to fight off the depressing feelings? I shop for cute clothes that I look amazing in, or put on some classical music && try to feel all skinny && sophisticated. The mood swings are the worst though. I remember just laying on my bed staring at the ceiling for hours just because I felt like doing nothing else. When you are actually in high spirits, write shit down that makes you feel even better, that way when your real low you know what it is. That might sound dumb, but I know when I hit that kinda low I can’t think of anything that will get me out.

As for moving the metabolism, your right, long walks won’t really cut it after a while. But every little thing counts. Obviously caffeine will spike your metabolism, as will lemon, (I’d suggest putting it in your tea) Also stretching does wonders. Your body will feel better && it’ll give you a bit of a metabolism boost. I’d also suggest getting green tea pills. Don’t OD on them && make sure to have pleanty of fluids if you’re gonna do it. I hope that helps <3

@2 years ago
#ask 

Anonymous asked: When you reach your gw what are you going to do? Are you going to have a higher gw or will you eat more now just to be healthier? Since your so close to your gw, what is next? Oh and last question how long did it take you to go from 130 to 110.6? And how much were you eating cal wise. Thanks for your time hun :)

When I’ll probably go lower, I mean I’m .6 away && sometimes I feel too big >.<;; I’m dying to get my thighs at seventeen inches && then I know I’ll be dying to get smaller, weight isn’t my main concern anymore. Now eating has become a game. It’s fun to see how low I can go on the scale & see how long I can go with food. I’m sick I know but I don’t want that number climbing any higher anymore. I just want to fit in a pair of pants I bought last year && have them fit with a lot a room in my thighs. That’s my goal, but I’m too scared to try them on, I’ll wait.

From 130 to 100.6 took three months, it was my new years resolution to lose 20 pounds and I REALLY started doing something about it in February. I was doing it really healthy like at first but then I got sick again, figures.

&& eating calorie wise? It depends on the day? I go anywhere from 0-1000+ When I was with my ex he’d force me to eat or he said he’s leave me. He left so when I’m on my own it’s no more then 100 , when I binge no more then 700, when I’m visiting friends or staying with someone for more then I few days we always end up going out to eat or I eat so they don’t know && I’ll get a good 1000+ in sometimes. I feel disgusting after so I usually just pop a laxative && fast for the next few days, I’m by myself a lot so that rarely happens.

@3 years ago
#ask 

mlk-hny asked: Do you ever feel terrified when your ana's in "remission," if you will?
That even though you're not physically miserable right now, you will hate yourself in a month because you will have gained five pounds?

If so, how do you cope? How do you manage to keep yourself motivated?

Fear does take over when I’m ‘coming out of my sickness’ at first, for example when I went to college I was terrified of ‘the freshman fifteen’ so I made sure there were absolutely no snacks in my dorm room but I began to eat three large meals a day with my classmates thinking that would be okay && from there I would mindlessly eat lots of sweets.

I didn’t have a scale in college nor my measuring tape && my pants still fit at the time. It wasn’t until I had to start buying size five skinny jeans that I freaked out and started hating myself all over again. I bought hydroxycut with my last $50 but by then I had already bought two pairs of size five pants && my mind was off of it until I returned home from college && the scale said 130. That was too much for me so I tried to start dieting healthy && for a while it was working until I slipped back into ‘my sickness’ as I like to call it. My motivation was && still is a black pair of size zreo volcom skinny jeans that I aim to fit into with a good amount of room in my largess thighs. They hang on my wall as a reminder to me && my red bracelet I recently made has done wonders.

@3 years ago
#ask #anorexia #battle #fat thighs #sickness 

controlcontrol-deactivated20100 asked: Ok so I really need you to tell me what you're doing to lose weight because you're gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous.

Your adorable! Gorgeous I am not, there’s always something that needs to be improved. As for what I do to lose weight? Before I got sick I would restrict calories, but my day always started with a good breakfast to move my metabolism, I’d drink green tea often, walk for a good two hours with my friend just talked, then we’d go eat lunch/dinner around four && if I was still hungry I’d munch on some fruits && veggies. I wouldn’t eat after eight, simply because after eight I become inactive && just sit around so whatever I ate would just sit on my bones.

I do pretty much the same thing now, minus the eating >.<;; It’s really all about moving your metabolism, that’s what burns calories. I usually start the morning with a coffee, move on to a tea a few hours later, pop some sort of metabolism moving pill, exercise for a bit, chug some water with a little lemon to get my metabolism going again, chew some gum or smoke when I get hungry or just to entertain my mouth && take another sort of pill a few hours before I decide to go to bed. Sleep is also really important && you can burn about 45 calories just sleeping! I hope this helps dear <3

@3 years ago
#ask #what I'm doing #before ana 

Anonymous asked: hey love! I've been battling anorexia for years on and off. It's strange how my high weight of 140-145 can go as low as usually in the 120's when I'm anorexic. I can only get it as low as 113. How do you fight off depressing feelings? that's the reason that I gain weight and can't seem to keep off the extra few pounds to keep my looking great. When I starve myself I know depression is the one thing that makes my weight go up and down a few pounds ><. I know it must slow down my metablism too. I've had anorexica on and off for 8 years, since I was 11, so I'm sure it slows down my metablism. The long long walks don't cut it very often anymore. any other suggestions?

WHY MUST YOU BE AN ANON?! I’d love to check up on you dear <3 How to fight off the depressing feelings? I shop for cute clothes that I look amazing in, or put on some classical music && try to feel all skinny && sophisticated. The mood swings are the worst though. I remember just laying on my bed staring at the ceiling for hours just because I felt like doing nothing else. When you are actually in high spirits, write shit down that makes you feel even better, that way when your real low you know what it is. That might sound dumb, but I know when I hit that kinda low I can’t think of anything that will get me out.

As for moving the metabolism, your right, long walks won’t really cut it after a while. But every little thing counts. Obviously caffeine will spike your metabolism, as will lemon, (I’d suggest putting it in your tea) Also stretching does wonders. Your body will feel better && it’ll give you a bit of a metabolism boost. I’d also suggest getting green tea pills. Don’t OD on them && make sure to have pleanty of fluids if you’re gonna do it. I hope that helps <3

2 years ago
#ask 

mlk-hny asked: Do you ever feel terrified when your ana's in "remission," if you will?
That even though you're not physically miserable right now, you will hate yourself in a month because you will have gained five pounds?

If so, how do you cope? How do you manage to keep yourself motivated?

Fear does take over when I’m ‘coming out of my sickness’ at first, for example when I went to college I was terrified of ‘the freshman fifteen’ so I made sure there were absolutely no snacks in my dorm room but I began to eat three large meals a day with my classmates thinking that would be okay && from there I would mindlessly eat lots of sweets.

I didn’t have a scale in college nor my measuring tape && my pants still fit at the time. It wasn’t until I had to start buying size five skinny jeans that I freaked out and started hating myself all over again. I bought hydroxycut with my last $50 but by then I had already bought two pairs of size five pants && my mind was off of it until I returned home from college && the scale said 130. That was too much for me so I tried to start dieting healthy && for a while it was working until I slipped back into ‘my sickness’ as I like to call it. My motivation was && still is a black pair of size zreo volcom skinny jeans that I aim to fit into with a good amount of room in my largess thighs. They hang on my wall as a reminder to me && my red bracelet I recently made has done wonders.

3 years ago
#ask #anorexia #battle #fat thighs #sickness 

Anonymous asked: When you reach your gw what are you going to do? Are you going to have a higher gw or will you eat more now just to be healthier? Since your so close to your gw, what is next? Oh and last question how long did it take you to go from 130 to 110.6? And how much were you eating cal wise. Thanks for your time hun :)

When I’ll probably go lower, I mean I’m .6 away && sometimes I feel too big >.<;; I’m dying to get my thighs at seventeen inches && then I know I’ll be dying to get smaller, weight isn’t my main concern anymore. Now eating has become a game. It’s fun to see how low I can go on the scale & see how long I can go with food. I’m sick I know but I don’t want that number climbing any higher anymore. I just want to fit in a pair of pants I bought last year && have them fit with a lot a room in my thighs. That’s my goal, but I’m too scared to try them on, I’ll wait.

From 130 to 100.6 took three months, it was my new years resolution to lose 20 pounds and I REALLY started doing something about it in February. I was doing it really healthy like at first but then I got sick again, figures.

&& eating calorie wise? It depends on the day? I go anywhere from 0-1000+ When I was with my ex he’d force me to eat or he said he’s leave me. He left so when I’m on my own it’s no more then 100 , when I binge no more then 700, when I’m visiting friends or staying with someone for more then I few days we always end up going out to eat or I eat so they don’t know && I’ll get a good 1000+ in sometimes. I feel disgusting after so I usually just pop a laxative && fast for the next few days, I’m by myself a lot so that rarely happens.

3 years ago
#ask 

controlcontrol-deactivated20100 asked: Ok so I really need you to tell me what you're doing to lose weight because you're gorgeous. Absolutely gorgeous.

Your adorable! Gorgeous I am not, there’s always something that needs to be improved. As for what I do to lose weight? Before I got sick I would restrict calories, but my day always started with a good breakfast to move my metabolism, I’d drink green tea often, walk for a good two hours with my friend just talked, then we’d go eat lunch/dinner around four && if I was still hungry I’d munch on some fruits && veggies. I wouldn’t eat after eight, simply because after eight I become inactive && just sit around so whatever I ate would just sit on my bones.

I do pretty much the same thing now, minus the eating >.<;; It’s really all about moving your metabolism, that’s what burns calories. I usually start the morning with a coffee, move on to a tea a few hours later, pop some sort of metabolism moving pill, exercise for a bit, chug some water with a little lemon to get my metabolism going again, chew some gum or smoke when I get hungry or just to entertain my mouth && take another sort of pill a few hours before I decide to go to bed. Sleep is also really important && you can burn about 45 calories just sleeping! I hope this helps dear <3

3 years ago
#ask #what I'm doing #before ana